While reflecting at the end of the year and visualizing my 2011 theme, “Year of the Courageous Explorer”, I was reminded of a backcountry trek I took a few years ago in the Skoki Lakes region in Banff National Park. The old saying “feel the fear and do it anyway” allowed me to experience a remarkable natural event, one that I will never forget.
It was the last night of our trek, the mountains were covered in an early autumn snow and it was a full harvest moon. I heard the kind of howl that began with frenetic yips and yaps, and gradually swelled into a solid yowl. It turned into one constant surging wild canine voice. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up. My heart raced. Only my sleeping bag and the nylon tent stood between me and the pack of nearby wolves.
I unzipped my sleeping bag and pushed past my fear to look outside. The full moon cast vivid shadows across the mountainous landscape. The harsh blue-white glow illuminated the stark, snowy, unforgiving terrain. I understood immediately why the wolves were howling. The natural and dangerous beauty had evoked within them a visceral response. At a deep level, I felt a sudden connection to the web of all existence. I felt grateful, even privileged, to witness such a magnificent natural wonder.
Out in the backcountry we were two days from help and completely on our own. We didn’t have a lot of options. We could have stayed huddled in our sleeping bags, worrying. We could have stuffed earplugs under our hats to try to muffle the howl and lessen our distress. Or, we could have thrown back the night and our fear and joined the celebration. This time I made the choice to follow my curiosity which was stronger than my fear and I was rewarded with an unforgettable experience.
Reflecting back on that moment, I was reminded of how often I “play it safe” by staying zipped up in my sleeping bag of everyday life, ignoring the call of the wild. But with choosing to be courageous, I am always surprised with a reconnection to my true and natural spirit. When I do venture outside of my safe tent there are lots of opportunities to explore. So I wonder, where else could I hear a natural call? Perhaps this year my motto will be “leave the tent behind”.
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- Is a wolfs howl or a coyotes yip louder? (greenanswers.com)
January 5, 2011
I love the reflection — when I am staying zipped up to “stay safe”. Thanks for this piece, I loved it.
January 5, 2011
Thank you for sharing Carol – it’s reassuring to me as I continue to feel my fear, and hope that it may also lead me to powerful and instinctive experiences.
January 6, 2011
wow Carol… I remember when you took that trip. What a wonderful experience….your own version of “dancing with wolves” and yes I know you are very brave. Be it swimming with sharks or trekking thru mountains, you have been so blessed to experience so much out of life. So Bravo, girl!!!! May the new year open more windows and doors for you and thanks for sharing.
January 11, 2011
Thank you to the Courageous Explorer for this delicious story of communion.
January 12, 2011
You are very welcome Annie! Looking forward to continued connections.